Money is a fact of life that has the potential to cause trouble in your relationships; that is where Lassise Financial Coaching can help protect your finances and relationship.
However, some trouble starts early — especially when it comes to money.
The leading cause of stress in a relationship is finances, according to a study by SunTrust Bank. The research found that 35 percent of people named money as the primary trouble spot with their partner.”Get on the same page before trouble brews.”-Jacqueline Newman, managing partner of Berkman Bottger Newman & Rodd
For newlyweds and long-term twosomes, here are the top five money mistakes to avoid and how financial Coaching can help protect your finances and relationship.
1. Hiding money
It may seem harmless at first, but keeping a savings account or stash of cash hidden from your partner can be your downfall, once your significant other catches on.
“They find out and then trust is destroyed,” Newman said.
Still, most people are guilty to some extent. In 2 out of every 5 couples, one spouse admits to lying to his or her partner about money, according to a 2018 survey by the National Endowment for Financial Education. In addition, 75 percent of those surveyed said financial deception has adversely affected their relationships.
If that’s an issue, Newman advises couples to agree to keep some separate spending money in their budget so that each person can splurge without having to justify the expense to the partner. This can be taken care of with the assistance of a financial coach who can guide you and your partner through your finances and help create transparency in your relationship. Sometimes a financial coach is the only relationship coach you need!
Financial Coaching can help you protect your finances and relationship.
2. Hiding debt
Worse than stashing cash, is keeping debt underwraps, said Newman. “Not only is it a lie, but if there is less money, and you are not as secure as you once were, there’s a lot of anger.”
About 31 percent of people said keeping credit cards and other accounts from a partner is worse than physical infidelity, according to a recent report from CreditCards.com. Financial Coaching can help you protect your finances and relationship by adding transparency about each of your debts and what you owe, with a knowledgeable mediator who can help ease the tension of discussing money.
Here’s when it pays to have an honest conversation about what you have and what you owe, Newman said. “Get on the same page before trouble brews.”
It’s a classic relationship quandary but if one of you is inherently a saver and the other a spender, conflict will likely develop without an understanding.
“This happens more when one person earns more than the other,” Newman said. “The earner resents the spender, that’s your stereotypical cliche.”
To ease the stress of not seeing eye-to-eye on spending, agree to a certain level of saving, such as 10 percent to 20 percent of your combined income. Financial Coaching can help your relationship by setting you up with automated savings on your accounts, and can even give tips on how to pinch pennies. This way, you can focus on what you can do with your partner, not what you can afford to do with your partner.
On the flip side, if one person in the relationship is too tight with the purse strings, problems can arise just the same. “It can be embarrassing in social situations,” Newman said, and “it can become a very big issue.”
In this case, it may help to consult a financial coach to help you protect your finances and relationship with proper budgeting. This alleviates resentment as well as the stress in a relationship, especially one where one person is more frugal than the other.
5. Financial abuse
In extreme situations, disputes over money are a battle for power, which is more often the case in very traditional household situations, Newman said.
Though traditional gender roles are changing, financial advisors say, many couples still adhere to them, with men generally taking the lead on finances. If the other person is left purposefully in the dark and uncomfortable with that, it’s a problem, she said.
In each case, whether it applies to your own relationship or not, start a conversation about what money means to you and your aspirations for the future, Newman said.
“Money isn’t just about buying milk; it represents safety and long-term goals,” she said. Financial Coaching can help you protect your finances and relationship by streamlining communication about finances and adding trust to your relationship.
When it comes to money and relationships, what you don’t know may kill your relationship. Hire Andrew Lassise at Lassise Financial Coaching so he can help you get your money on track so you can focus on fun and freedom with your partner instead of potential financial ruin. Contact us today for a 30 minute consultation for personal finance – if Andrew cannot find a way to save you $500 in a year, the first session is free! You have nothing to lose and everything to gain for both your wallet and your relationship!